Dont want to rant too much about my online run bad again but just gonna take a moment to reflect on where I am right now and how things are going for me..
In my 2nd yr of coll..almost at the end of this sem with 1 more yr to go..I feel like I’m at a roadblock rite now. Pretty undecided about what I’m gonna be doing. Feels like I should be able to easily complete my degree but I’m not so sure about dat..hav got 5 outta 7 arrears from last sem to clear besides my subjects from this sem..my attendance as usual is at rock bottom..am always worried bout my hod calling my folks and telling them im gonna be suspended. well not so worried in the sense im not too sure if i hav any motivation to complete my degree myself. i literally feel no urge to go to coll at all..end up just leaving the house most days and not going to coll when im supposed to. feel like shit when im sitting in class..guys in my class feel like aliens to me..like we’re on different planes and in different worlds..not 1 word of any of the lecturers ever goes in. im usually falling asleep almost all the time in class. such a bad spot im in coll wise that i really hav no idea wat im gonna end up doing finally.
im not too worried personally rite now if i hav to take a tc or sumthin..its just my folks dat will not take it well, prolly my entire family as well. but i know dat its not the end of the road for me worst comes to worst. i hav poker to fall on, i’ve got a lot of ideas and ambitions in my head. i feel like it wuld actually do me lot more good rite now if i got kicked out of coll prolly..i dunno. my coll life is adversely affecting all my other activities. im always feelin dull..dont feel like going to gym when i should be. im at my peak point in terms of weight and my fitness is pretty bad. i feel like i can sort out a lot of things in my life if i can just quit going to coll but again a degree’s a degree and dat’s wat’s being constantly re-emphasized to me.
I’ve been running pretty bad online as well. Not gonna be linking any hands but so many spots where I have hug equity and I end up losing each and every time..all in spots where I could potentially go on to finish really well but instead end up not cashing at all..on and on. Anyways, downswings are part of online poker especially when ur only playing MTTs and a good poker player should know to take them in stride and just play the best poker he can knowing that a big score or two are just around the corner.
On a brighter note, I’ve found a new group to play poker with here in Chennai..my scene had pretty much dried up and this one’s looking a lot brighter. Played some 50/50 stakes for bout 3 hrs and was up a pretty decent amount..so a good beginning on this front 😀